People commonly think about falling in love and in one way or another, falling out from it suddenly. Well, there is a certain feeling wherein we can feel a sudden adrenaline rush whenever we see, or we stay with that someone in the same room, or if by chance, we talk with that someone one on one or with a group. Some may falsely think that it is already LOVE. We tend to have crushes or admire someone for some certain personalities or features, most often the physical “thing”. Then when we get to know the person more, we would get discouraged by some of their attitudes and eventually decides that we don’t like them anymore. Can you imagine the span of time? Very short.
Real love is never like that. It is so different from the kind of love most of us have known all our lives that it deserves both a name-Real Love-and a definition of its own. Real Love is caring about the happiness of another person without any thought for what we might get for ourselves. It’s also Real Love when other people care about our happiness unconditionally. It is not Real Love when other people like us for doing what they want. We can be certain that we’re receiving Real Love only when we make foolish mistakes, when we fail to do what other people want, and even when we get in their way, but they don’t feel disappointed or irritated at us. That is Real Love (true unconditional love), and that love alone has the power to heal all wounds, bind people together, and create relationships quite beyond our present capacity to imagine.
It is love when we accept everything about the person-including the bad side. Attitude will never matter anymore because hopes that the person will still change are high. All his friends, even if we don’t have the same ideals or interests with them, will also become our friends. Everything the person loves, we will learn to love also. We will really adapt to everything-environment, his likes and dislikes and etc.. And even if time would pass by, our love for the person never fades.
* Love is not an emotion. Although real love is often accompanied by strong feelings, love does not equate with the sense of floating on clouds. Unlike the type of love that movies, television, and songs portray, people in love don’t always feel ooey gooey around each other. A relationship wouldn’t last long on emotions. In fact, knowledge is the basis of a healthy relationship.
* Love isn’t sex. That statement alone goes against a lot of what the entertainment industry feeds us. Whenever two people hook up in pop culture, they have sex. Without showing some of the unpleasant realities of premarital and extramarital sex, it is drawn up to be a wonderful, fun recreational activity.
Sex is created for marriage–a long-lasting commitment between a couple. Outside of marriage, sex can have harsh consequences. Pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases, guilt, insecurity, and shame can follow. A relationship based on lust can only last as long as the two are physically close and find each other sexually attractive.
* Love is not a choice. It’s a commitment. Although feelings will accompany love, and although sex will be a part of marriage, a lasting, healthy relationship cannot be based on these things. One person involved in a relationship should be aware that upon entering such, he/she should be committed to our partners. Meaning, faithfulness should be one big issue.
Real love knocks our hearts at the right time. We will know it if the time spent of our relationship does not lessen our feelings for our partners. We can still see our world in his/her eyes and his/her world on ours. And instead of falling out of love for the person, we will love them more as time goes by.